You may feel envious when you hear about relationships that have lasted a long time, but you do not have to. You have your own relationship to attend to and it is not really difficult to ensure the longevity of your relationship. It takes time, but it is not difficult or impossible. Other people are able to do it and so can you. You only need to know the “secrets” of a rock solid relationship that will last a long time. Here are a few important things you can do to achieve a successful long-term relationship.
Trust is the most solid foundation of a relationship. Without trust, a domestic partner or spouse will be constantly plagued by arguments that are caused by insecurity and jealousy. You will lose passion and interest in a relationship because you are always fighting about something that is probably very trivial in the first place. Work hard to make your partner trust you and your partner should do the same as well. When there is trust, insecurities and jealousy can be avoided along with the problems that they bring into a relationship.
Make Your Partner Feel Safe
Safety and security are two important relationship aspects that you and your partner should expect from each other. There is no doubt that you will go the extra mile to protect your partner, but if your partner does not feel safe with you, then it is a sign that your relationship is doomed to fail. Your partner should feel secure with you physically and emotionally. There should be assurance that you will not verbally or physically abuse your partner and you have the right to expect the same.
Communication is always the key to a successful relationship, but the manner of your communication will also matter. Contemptuous communication is definitely a detriment to your success. This type of communication does not respect your partner and tends to attack your partner directly for his or her shortcomings instead of addressing them. This kind of communication will result in another argument that usually ends up in insults and the inability to move forward at all.
On the other hand, communicating with respect involves bringing up the other party’s shortcomings without making an attack on the other person’s capabilities. This method of communication is more productive and helps to avoid feelings of anger and resentment that contemptuous communication tends to bring up.
Resolve and Do Not Bring Up Past Conflicts
Successful relationships happen when partners are able to resolve their conflicts and close the book on those chapters for good. You already know that communication is important when resolving conflicts; even ones that are smaller in scale. However, it is not a good idea to open old wounds when faced with a new problem. When you do that, it means that you and your partner have not truly resolved the issue. In some cases, it is a sign of a bigger problem in your relationship.
Conflict resolution is a skill that is necessary in any relationship. When possible, do not sleep without resolving a problem. However, it could also be important to give a bit of space until both you and your partner have cooled down enough to talk about the problem in a civilized manner. Avoid bringing up old conflicts that you have supposedly resolved before. However, if the problem cannot be avoided, set that matter aside to be discussed at an appropriate time. When your relationship has all five of these attributes, you can expect it to be successful and last for a long time. It takes a lot of work, but it should be a two-way affair.